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gogmagogFor the past week or so, I've spent every waking hour that I wasn't at work or class playing Disgaea. I've clocked, about 80 hours in the past week and a half. (SO...ADDICTIVE...) My mom's getting kind of worried. XD
On the plus side, Overlord Prier/Priere is now my bitch. I kicked her level 2400+ ass (forgot to pass the Weaker Enemies bills) with my level 810 Divine Majin Orlandu, using the island trick. Then, of course, I challenged a level 3000+ Marjoly (stupid Stronger Enemies) and promptly got raped by her level 50 Tera spells.
Following this humbling defeat, I picked myself, wiped myself off, leveled my DM up to 2000 in Cave of Ordeals 3 and remembered this time to pass the Weaker Enemies bills. The DM and Prier took out a much more manageable level 2500 Marjoly, and now she's joined me as well. (Though with her Tera spells at level 1...what's with that, dammit?!) Now all I have to do is beat Baal and Uber Prinny Baal. It'll be a while though, considering my kick-ass level 2000 Divine Majin with 255 Sword mastery and a Cosmic Blade can't do more than 0 damage to Baal with his most powerful specials. So I've transmigrated my two DMs (sword and magic), and I think I may try to get some legendary rank 40 weapons first...the best weapon I have right now is Etna's legendary Longinus from the castle, and a legendary Lucifer Force that I'm probably going to give to Prier or Marjoly.
However, that's not all I did - I also went and saw Troy this weekend at the dollar theatre.
I thought that, like Gladiator, it was pretty good for a cheesy sword-and-sandal epic. It basically came off as an excuse to show four things, though:
1) Kickass fight scenes
2) Eric Bana's bare upper body
3) Orlando Bloom's bare upper body
4) Brad Pitt's bare upper body and ass
Not that I'm complaining about any of this. XD
But still, the people who were all "OMG GREAT EPIC FILM" leave me kind of torn between feeling mildly amused and mildly taken aback. (As one example see the review by Orson Scott Card, who is one of my favorite authors but with whom I disagree greatly on politics and more and more lately his movie/book/other reviews as well.)
I mean, the "romance" between Briseis and Achilles (in addition to being invented from whole cloth for the movie) is pure bodice-ripper. "Oh, I hate your guts because you're pillaging my people and killing my relatives, and I'll attempt to kill you by slitting your throat in the night, but you're such a big sexy hunk of STUD that I can't bring myself to do it and must submit to the hypnotic power of your penis!!!1!" And with a lot of the changes, I couldn't understand why they were made. Why is Paris is turned into a sniveling coward? He was thoughtless and selfish in the Iliad, but not generally a coward like this. Why have Hector kill Menelaus (which threw me for a loop) and why have Briseis kill Agamemnon (which was just stupid)? Why have Andromache, Astyanax, etc. escape rather than having them be sold into slavery? (Though to be fair, that one might have made for a bit of a downer of a movie...on the other hand, if they wanted something that ended happily, why pick the Trojan War as a subject?)
Other shallow thoughts about the film:
- Someone needs desperately to throw Saffron Burrows a burger. The woman makes Calista Flockhart look like Mama Cass. She's almost as tall as Eric Bana, which puts her at close to six feet, and she can't weigh more than 115 pounds, if that.
- Eric Bana should kiss his agent's feet. He's the only member of the cast whose character didn't come off as either a refugee from the short bus or a graduate of the Snidely Whiplash School of Evil Cackling.
- Orlando Bloom's hair looks like mine on a good day.
- Diane Kruger is pretty, but she doesn't quite have the charisma to carry off a role like Helen. Someone like Catherine Zeta-Jones is who is needed here - someone who's not only authentically gorgeous (and preferably, like Zeta-Jones, in a classic, timeless way) but who can make you BELIEVE that this woman is a legendary beauty.
- Brad Pitt really does have a nice ass, but he could have used acting lessons for the first half of the film.
And it's time...let's positive linking!
- Join the army, get a free boob or nose job!
- The skinny on the Atkins diet, from the squirrel's mouth
And the meme everybody and their brother is doing:
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shinkun as Evil Incarnate I can buy. But only if it's the Nippon Ichi candy-flavored kind of evil.
On the plus side, Overlord Prier/Priere is now my bitch. I kicked her level 2400+ ass (forgot to pass the Weaker Enemies bills) with my level 810 Divine Majin Orlandu, using the island trick. Then, of course, I challenged a level 3000+ Marjoly (stupid Stronger Enemies) and promptly got raped by her level 50 Tera spells.
Following this humbling defeat, I picked myself, wiped myself off, leveled my DM up to 2000 in Cave of Ordeals 3 and remembered this time to pass the Weaker Enemies bills. The DM and Prier took out a much more manageable level 2500 Marjoly, and now she's joined me as well. (Though with her Tera spells at level 1...what's with that, dammit?!) Now all I have to do is beat Baal and Uber Prinny Baal. It'll be a while though, considering my kick-ass level 2000 Divine Majin with 255 Sword mastery and a Cosmic Blade can't do more than 0 damage to Baal with his most powerful specials. So I've transmigrated my two DMs (sword and magic), and I think I may try to get some legendary rank 40 weapons first...the best weapon I have right now is Etna's legendary Longinus from the castle, and a legendary Lucifer Force that I'm probably going to give to Prier or Marjoly.
However, that's not all I did - I also went and saw Troy this weekend at the dollar theatre.
I thought that, like Gladiator, it was pretty good for a cheesy sword-and-sandal epic. It basically came off as an excuse to show four things, though:
1) Kickass fight scenes
2) Eric Bana's bare upper body
3) Orlando Bloom's bare upper body
4) Brad Pitt's bare upper body and ass
Not that I'm complaining about any of this. XD
But still, the people who were all "OMG GREAT EPIC FILM" leave me kind of torn between feeling mildly amused and mildly taken aback. (As one example see the review by Orson Scott Card, who is one of my favorite authors but with whom I disagree greatly on politics and more and more lately his movie/book/other reviews as well.)
I mean, the "romance" between Briseis and Achilles (in addition to being invented from whole cloth for the movie) is pure bodice-ripper. "Oh, I hate your guts because you're pillaging my people and killing my relatives, and I'll attempt to kill you by slitting your throat in the night, but you're such a big sexy hunk of STUD that I can't bring myself to do it and must submit to the hypnotic power of your penis!!!1!" And with a lot of the changes, I couldn't understand why they were made. Why is Paris is turned into a sniveling coward? He was thoughtless and selfish in the Iliad, but not generally a coward like this. Why have Hector kill Menelaus (which threw me for a loop) and why have Briseis kill Agamemnon (which was just stupid)? Why have Andromache, Astyanax, etc. escape rather than having them be sold into slavery? (Though to be fair, that one might have made for a bit of a downer of a movie...on the other hand, if they wanted something that ended happily, why pick the Trojan War as a subject?)
Other shallow thoughts about the film:
- Someone needs desperately to throw Saffron Burrows a burger. The woman makes Calista Flockhart look like Mama Cass. She's almost as tall as Eric Bana, which puts her at close to six feet, and she can't weigh more than 115 pounds, if that.
- Eric Bana should kiss his agent's feet. He's the only member of the cast whose character didn't come off as either a refugee from the short bus or a graduate of the Snidely Whiplash School of Evil Cackling.
- Orlando Bloom's hair looks like mine on a good day.
- Diane Kruger is pretty, but she doesn't quite have the charisma to carry off a role like Helen. Someone like Catherine Zeta-Jones is who is needed here - someone who's not only authentically gorgeous (and preferably, like Zeta-Jones, in a classic, timeless way) but who can make you BELIEVE that this woman is a legendary beauty.
- Brad Pitt really does have a nice ass, but he could have used acting lessons for the first half of the film.
And it's time...let's positive linking!
- Join the army, get a free boob or nose job!
- The skinny on the Atkins diet, from the squirrel's mouth
And the meme everybody and their brother is doing:
shinkun as Evil Incarnate I can buy. But only if it's the Nippon Ichi candy-flavored kind of evil.
